My Sort of Networking
November 28, 2006 · → 11 Comments
It is time to fess up – I am NOT a fan of networking. In fact it could be said that I hate it. The people who know me best have seen the cynical look on my face at “networking events” (I go whole hog at times – rolling eyes, sarcastic comments, looking for an opportunity to make a bee-line for the door.
I’m not saying that I can’t do it. In fact if you caught me on a good day and I was in a group of people that I found interesting you wouldn’t know the difference.
The thing is I DO understand the benefits of having a strong network of contacts. As a small business owner they help connect me into a broader community, give me an opportunity to become better known, and also have been the foundation for a couple of great friendships. I just can’t stand the “smarmy”, false, and shallow connections that seemed to abound at some networking events.
So a couple of times a year I “should on myself” (you know the way it is … “I should get out and do more networking”). Most times I either ignore that feeling or I give into the “standard” networking opportunities. But NO MORE!! Thanks to Ben!
Ben Yoskovitz has lived up to the name of his blog and been an instigator in a new approach to networking for me. I’m am on a mission to get to know more of the small business women in my local community and work out a way I can do something to help them. I am even going to take up Ben’s challenge and seek out 5 local entrepreneurs.
This approach inspires me a great deal more than going and having coffee/breakfast/lunch/drinks with a group of people who are generally looking to sell me their services. The opportunity to have a positive effect for another business woman actually makes me want to get out there.
How about who? Does this appeal more than shaking hands, swapping business cards and getting added to another person’s email newsletter.
Great idea Ben!
LOVE the cartoon! Face to face networking is not my thing – I am much better when it comes to virtual networking.
The cartoon comes from the wonderful Hugh Macleod at gapingvoid – http://www.gapingvoid.com
I’m starting to discover that networking can also be about collaboration with people you already know. That seems to generate mutually beneficial outcomes as well as spreading the word about (and introducing more people to) ME.
Hey, this cartoon reminds of something I think I heard in church once: “Before you attend to your brother’s lack of business cards, first remove the …” Oh, no that was something else.
Great cartoon — and post!
I call folks like the guy in the cartoon, Networking Nazis!
When you ask first. Let the other talk first. They are then happy to find out about you.
Great listeners are great conversationalists.
Lyle
Business Networking Advice, is “Expert advice on Business Networking and tips on developing your networking skills.”
http://businessnetworkingadvice.com/
It’s a good source andyou can find interesting point why networking can be good and networking tips.
See the interview with the Chief Happiness Officer.
I’m with you on the networking events. I accidentally ended up at one last week and was reminded of the reasons I usually avoid them. Thanks for pointing me towards Ben’s great post. It’s got my brain ticking.
You are spot on Lyle – great listeners make great conversationalists. Just think about the number of times you’ve said very little except to express an interest in the other person and they walk away saying how interesting YOU are.
I can hear the ticking from here Sarah. If you come up with any other good ideas then be sure to let me know.
Great cartoon Leah! And I can relate to the networking annoyance. I too recognize that it can be beneficial, but only do it upon a strong force making me, or falling into the position without choice. It’s not to say that I’ve never met an interesting person, or a great new potential client through networking, but the “smarmy” individuals drive me nuts!
hear hear! My worst nightmare is “networking events”… filled with the same ol’ same ol’… the one comfort is it helps hone my listening skills, and allows me to practice noticing and dissolving the “ego”. I find after most events, i can tell you every minute detail about those with whom I engaged in “dialogue” .. except it was more a “monologue” and not mine!!! Still, the optimist in me keeps me going back to the events, and perhaps one day I’ll discover a forum that is truly stimulating., inspiring, engaging, and MUTUALLY enriching… until then, I love the rich online world.
Karynne
How to have effective networking activities
1. Think match-making, not sales opportunity. Through match-making you are attempting to create friendships and gratitude.
2. Avoid transactional relationships when networking. Having a quid pro quo approach to networking eventually leads to disaster.
3. Remember those people who have used points one and two when offering to help you. The person who tries to help when there is no profit for herself, is the person whose friendship is most valuable.
On point #1 read Endless Referrals by Bob Berg and Dig Your Well Before You’re Thirsty by Harvey McKay.
On point #2 read The Power Principle by Blaine Lee.
And keep developing your own internal cohesion and personal integrity.